This
is the story of Hamlet,
William Shakespeare's most notable play,
a magnificent dignified work of art.
But for you, Buster,
I guess I ought to tell it this way.
Hamlet was the prince
of a spot called Denmark.
There never was such a frantic guy,
either before or since.
He was a dream boy,
and like a hole in the head,
Denmark needed that friend.
He bumped off his uncle
and a mega -friend of his mother,
and he drove his girl to suicide
and stabbed her big brother
Because he didn't want nobody else
but himself should live.
He was what you might
call uncooperat ive.
Hamlet had a lady friend
named Ophelia.
She was a cool put -together chick
that made men thrill.
But Hamlet, thought,
she was from Uglyville.
Oh, he didn't seem to
get the message.
chopped down her father
just to teach the girl a lesson.
Yes, he cut him up
and sliced him
like a pound of delicatessen.
Murder was one thing
Hamlet sure did enjoy, sure did enjoy.
He was what you might call
quite the mischievous boy.
Ophelia, overcome with such
grief an d sorrow,
she went and her lid,
she popped her cork,
She jumped the track,
an d her intelligent mind
developed a permanent crack.
Things went black.
Ophelia had a six -and -a
-half -foot brother.
He thought that Hamlet had
been a trifle too impolite.
So in the third act,
he challenged him to a fight.
What a night!
It was dog -eat, dog -eat,
dog in Denmark
Yes, it was dog -eat,
dog -eat, dog in Denmark
The moral of my story is very plain
You better get a muzzle if
you got a Great Dane
And the name of this omelet
is Hamlet you