What do you do,
the first time you look into a pair
of baby blue eyes?
You've come to the right man.
What do you say, Dad,
when she says, how are you,
and you just can't think of replies?
Well, you have hit a naughty little problem,
boy, of that there is no doubt.
You'll soon be finding out
what some most engrossing
things are all about.
What makes them tick, Dan?
Well, you see, they say you're their fella,
then they're not at home when you call.
Oh, but you'll learn.
That's an old trick, lad.
They let you feel sort of mellow,
and then they pin your scalp
right to the wall.
Oh, in this game
the cards are stacked against you,
But don't give up,
just keep your powder dry.
Well, that's what I'll do.
Yes, yes, that's what you do, lad.
And I've got a feeling you'll get by.
Now tell me something,
when you try to talk,
does your Adam's apple
sort of get tangled up with
your words?
Yeah, that's the one,
that's the one, yeah.
And when you take a walk,
you and your lady,
have you got two left feet?
That's right,
and it's sure for the birds.
And do you get all hot and flustered
when the lady straightens your tie? man,
it's really murder.
An d when you meet her father,
do you get a feeling
that you're wanted by the FBI?
In several states.
When she says hello,
do your heart and your stomach
turn over and start tight?
Oh, I really got it bad.
When you're at the show
and you're eating popcorn,
do your hands sorta meet
in the bag?
Let's not get drippy about this thing.
Well, my friend,
from all of your symptoms,
the diagnosis is plain to see.
Tell me.
You've got psychosomatic,
post -epizootic, neurofrostatic,
pre -peripatetic, L -O -V -E
What'll I do, Dad?
Now, son, don't you worry,
for there's nothing time can not cure
Just fight it through, lad,
till you meet the right girl
And you'll know it's her,
but for sure
Well, how am I gonna know
which is the right one?
you'll find her.
You'll find her,
though you might fumble once or twice.
That happened to you, Dad?
to me?
Are you kidding?
It's happened to me, lad.
Or you wouldn't be here
to hear this good advice.
Well, thank you for the fatherly advice.
You're wel come to
the fatherly advice.
You