Have some
pity on an Easterner.
Show a little sympathy.
No one possibly could be sterner
than you have been with me.
There's a job that I'm applying for,
let me put it to you thus.
It's a partnership I'm dying for,
Mr. and Mrs. Us.
Before you file it on the shelf
Let me tell you of myself
Oh, I'm the chappy to make you happy
I'll tie your shoesies and
chase your bluesies
Oh, lady, would you?
Oh, lady, could you use me?
I'd shake the mat out and
put the cat out
I'd clean the garret and
feed the parrot
Oh, lady, would you, oh, tell me,
could you use me?
Do you realize what a good man
you're getting in me?
I'm no elker, mason, or woodman
who gets home at three.
The girls who see me
grow soft and dreamy,
but I'm a gander who won't philander.
Oh could you use me?
Cause I cer tainly could use
you
There's a chap I know in Mexico
Who's as strong as he can be
Eating nails and drinking Texaco
He is the type for me
There is one in California
More romantic far than you
When he sing
s ha -cha -cha -chornia
I often think he'll do
But as for you, sir, I'm afraid
You will never make the grade
For you're no cowboy,
you're soft and howt boy
I feel no muscle, let's fit for tussle
I must refuse you,
I cannot use you, excuse me.
No nightlife for you,
the birds would bore you,
The cows won't know you,
a horse would throw you,
You silly man, you, to ask me,
can you use me?
Though at love you may be a wizard,
I'm wanting to know,
Could you warm me up in a blizzard,
say 40 below?
Your thighs are freaky,
your knees are weakies,
you're not a sender,
you elbow bender,
though you can use me,
I most certainly can't use you.